relationship Archives - AM8 International

Posted on 8 February 20246 August 2024 by Dr B

The Coach-Parent Relationship for Tennis Players: but first Ice-cream & a little Tale before 1 of the ATP’s Top 10 gets the Spotlight

Do you remember my vert first ‘article’ shared on behalf of Beyond Top 10 Tennis? This is a loaded question of course given that I’ve written a number of Blogs over the years — some got lost and sit somewhere in the metaverse (perhaps), whilst others have become lost in cyber-space. Well, that’s a nice thought nonetheless. But seriously, others were so rich with goodies that they formed the backbone to my initial publications over 9 years ago. Bam!

That’s right, I’ve been at it for some time when the only means of sharing was through your own ‘Blogspot’ or ‘Blogger’ account (or similar). There was no function to share on social media and/or post links…now I’m starting to sound more ‘mature’ that what I truly believe to be the case. Truth be told, growing up is overrated and despite my accomplishments, some of which I have written about, I’m a big believer in balance.

And whatever works for you. Which means, if you’re guilty of having ice-cream for breakfast because it’s a weekend and you’re a ‘grown-up’ (used loosely), well all I have to say is rock-on!

I’ll probably never say that again. I’m not sure I’ve ever said that out loud either and I’m pretty sure that isn’t going to change. But here we are. Now, as some of you may know I can attest to writing quite a bit, or rather, perhaps a lot with 12 Books to my name. That said, sometimes the fun gets sucked out of it when you’re writing ‘non-fiction’ but I really do try to do my best with dropping the occasional f-bomb (for real) in my books. Some might get a little chuckle and others perhaps overly offended but I also think there’s a little art in the mix by keeping readers on their toes.

But this brings me to the beginning of Beyond Top 10 Tennis which is still less than a year ago when we kicked things off — and it was a long time coming. My very first post/article whichever tickles your fancy, was short and sweet and addressed this. The episode to match was a direct contrast. I was nervous and was of the belief it had to be perfect. As in, P.E.R.F.E.C.T without the hiccups. Truth be told, it took me a few dozen (or two) episodes to realise fun was the name of the game. That’s why we’re all here, right?

I mean sure, you maybe want to learn something. Come across something new. Maybe even whilst you’re eating ice-cream or being a little more fancy with that avocado on toast. But really, I’d argue that if you’re the one chomping down the former, you really are the lucky one!

But this isn’t about ice-cream. Nor avocado toast. For those of you who came for the appeal, you can ‘have you cake (or avocado toast), and it (or ice-cream), too’. I’m sure you all know which side I sit on.

Which brings me to the more heartfelt and serious topic perhaps around the Coach-Parent relationship. And no, it isn’t about ‘relationship’ in respect to mum and/or dad becoming fond of the Coach and kicking things off. No. No. Nope. It’s actually an academic term that has widely been shared with a little twist.

There’s a lot of work on the Coach-Athlete relationship, so much in fact that I’ve penned The Secrets to Optimal Performance Success, The Secrets to Optimal Wellbeing and The Secrets to Optimal Coaching Success (currently of focus on Beyond Top 10 Tennis), plus The Science of Elite Performance that showcases the intersection between ‘elite performance’ and the power of this very relationship, two-fold.

What’s of focus here, however, is the dynamic and how it plays out at the elite level. Most recently, Holger Rune is an ATP Top 10 player that has had quite a drastic rise to sit comfortably inside the Top of the game. He is nonetheless one of 4 current Top 10 players on the ATP tour who have not made a Grand Slam Final and or Won a Grand Slam. In comparison, the WTA has 8 active Finalists and/or Grand Slam Champions. And no, it isn’t what you think. But this week’s episode dives into this so I’m not about to do double-duty.

The focus here is on the Coach-Parent relationship and how this can affect a player’s rate of success. By all accounts, Rune has been doing one hell of a job to get into the Top 10 at 20 years of age. It’s kind of ridiculous. The challenge is to either maintain that level of he’ll soon regress outside the Top 10. And yes, we’ve got the data to back this. So how does he maintain his edge and nudge closer towards a Grand Slam title?

Well, the Coach-Parent relationship has a lot to do with it. Of interest, Holger Rune has had Serena Williams’ former coach on his team (not as his head coach), Severin Luthi (Roger Federer’s longtime coach and not as his head coach), to Boris Becker (Novak Djokovic’s former coach although not his sole head coach at the time). What’s important to note here is that irrespective the level of success of a Coach with their former players and their rate of success — 20 Grand Slams to their name or null, it doesn’t matter when you’re starting afresh with a new player.

Oh.my.God.No.you.didn’t.

Yep. It’s the truth. Oh, and yes, my latest publication “How to Develop a Top 10 Tennis Ranking” debunked this with the data and proved once and for all the tales many WTA to ATP players have been told. Truth is, 92% of coaches don’t know what they’re doing let alone have knowledge of the 8 Keys or 7 Keys that are responsible for the core metrics behind Grand Slam success. I mean, a player might progress towards the Top 20 without all 7 Keys in tact, but the Top 10 demands the 8th Key and if it goes whereabouts, trouble will come knocking before that player regresses outside the Top 10. Science is pretty cool when it uncovers these ‘kind’ of things.

But back to the Coach-Parent example. If a player doesn’t ‘gel’ with these notable ‘names’ it underscores this very problem. It’s not the name. It’s the dynamic. At the same time, a player who believes ‘multiple coaches’ is better than one, is a little conflicted. By all accounts, a head coach works wonders. But an ‘assistant coach’ can become problematic. This isn’t basketball and the player isn’t a ‘team’ — they’re an individual that are in need of a team. There’s a huge difference. Should they have ‘coaches’ for their mental health to physical health, of course. But these are not their ‘on-court coach’. There are players who have the right mix and achieved remarkable feats and then there are ones who just can’t quite get it right.

And this is a big barrier for Grand Slam success.

So, what is a player to do? The Coach-Parent relationship is key. Involving the parent (if they’re involved, like in Rune’s case) is a necessity. And if you don’t know how, well lucky for you AM8 International has the resources to guide you. But if anything is learned here, asides from ice-cream for breakfast is totally okay (all in moderation and all that), it’s that skipping and pushing out a coach on repeat is not healthy. Having multiple at the same time is even more problematic. Everyone needs to get along and this isn’t a given. Find the right mix. Quit scrambling around. Knuckle down and get those eyes set on a Grand Slam title. But this is only going to happen once there’s that core leader in place — that understands the parent, builds a healthy Coach-Parent dynamic whilst fostering an equally rewarding Coach-Athlete relationship.

And you know what? That’s how Grand Slams are Won.

To learn more about our data, predictive analytics and how to optimise your own performance, head on over to AM8 International. To learn more about AM8 International check out our selection of Books and/or options to join Dr B’s Pack to gain exclusive access to the best in the world. Not quite ready? Head on over to Beyond Top 10 Tennis for free access to 100+ episodes directly from Dr Berge of what it really takes to win multiple Grand Slams to securing that Top 10 tennis ranking with new episodes each week. More? Catch up on our Tips over on TikTok, Twitter, Threads or Instagram for quick snippets to apply in your game, today.

Posted on 2 November 20237 August 2024 by Dr B

Revisiting the Coach-Athlete Relationship Part 5: Developing an Elite Tennis Player

Following on from our previous discussion on the Coach-Athlete relationship and some concluding thought on this Chapter, it’s incredibly important to be mindful of how these key sections fit together in the The Secrets to Optimal Performance Success. The coach-parent relationship has to be one of my absolute favourites, although if I’m being honest, most of them are really powerful and hold equal weight. But for this particular one, it can get a little complex to misunderstood so here is a little extra clarity: no, this doesn’t necessarily mean your own parent and/or parents. Most of the time I try to include ‘guardian’ alongside parent, the same applies to player as ‘athlete’ is often featured at the same time. The thing is, some parents just aren’t going to be available due to competing priorities. This doesn’t mean for the player/athlete that their performance isn’t cared about and/or for, but it really comes down to time and/or availability. This is where it becomes important for the parents and/or guardians to have that conversation with their child to share this so they genuinely know why.

The next step from here is making sure there is someone else that can contribute towards the coach-parent relationship. After all, this is really an adult figure that can help the player/athlete navigate through some key decisions. One of these was really run home in Part 4 in revisiting Hiring and Firing Your Coach — it needs to happen sooner or later for most players/athletes and having an adult that understands them and their needs per the 7 Keys is incredibly helpful to guide the player/athlete on what’s best for them and their future endeavours.

Other segments of the Chapter were revisited in Episode 49 with some powerful associations. This includes Talent Identification and how often it does not serve the purpose of helping a player through The Pathway for the simple reason that it does not adhere to the principles of the Coach-Athlete relationship. Without these expectations being managed, these systems can be attributed towards Depression and Anxiety in Sport if too much emphasis is placed on outcomes opposed to steadily reaching that next peak performance cycle.

Nonetheless, this is just one of many varying aspects of the Coach-Athlete relationship that has behavioural implications for the developmental player/athlete and those they’re learning from — directly and/or indirectly.

This includes in-person interactions to those online and where social media plays a very ‘new’ role in a child’s development in contrast to a decade or two prior. Being mindful of these implications is incredibly important to lead by example for both parents and/or guardians and for coaches. This is where the tie to Player Behaviour can shift towards a coaches responsibility if they’re not leading by example.

Mental Stability is a constant at all stages of development and includes physical, emotional and mental wellbeing to ensure the whole athlete is considered opposed to a one dimensional view. This comes full circle to ensure both sides of the Coach-Athlete relationship are considered — the more easily management and apparent: performance based, to those that might not be as easy, oftentimes outside a coaches comfort zone: mental wellbeing. But here’s the thing, it really ‘can’ be inside a coaches comfort zone if the language is flipped to centre on mental conditioning and to work as a team to build more resilient outcomes whilst talking through expectations to ensure they remain within a manageable range. If this is not adhered to, pressure can mount quite rapidly and the player can become vulnerable to external influences.

Each child is impressionable to their surroundings and the tennis player is no different. Sure, these influences will change over the years, but the player/athelte still remains vulnerable to these susceptibilities if boundaries are not put in place.

Which brings the spotlight back to boundaries and ensuring these are in place to better protect the overall development of the player/athlete and as shared in Part 4 through referencing to negative noise and associated implications. But there is light at the end of the tunnel. In more recent years, the current Top 10 and higher stature players have started to speak out on the impact of negative noise often experienced through social media and only good things can come of this increasing level of awareness. Drawing attention towards the player/athlete and their overall wellbeing now will help put in place strategies that can be implemented in earlier years to better manage these tools/platforms whilst ideally mitigating the negative noise — irrespective if a player is ranked inside the Top 10, Top 50 or is a developing player. Players/athletes deserve a safe space to perform and the ability to quiet unwanted noise.

Posted on 31 October 20237 August 2024 by Dr B

Revisiting the Coach-Athlete Relationship Part 4: Developing an Elite Tennis Player

After sharing additional insights on all other sections of the initial chapter of The Secrets to Optimal Performance Success, the topic of Performance Expectations really showcases how ‘pressure’ remains a constant throughout play irrespective of what stage of development to progression and/or topic is being discussed. This underpins why key steps need to be put in place to remove the negative noise. A discussion in and of itself, the idea of protecting your inner circle is incredibly true in attempt to mitigate negative implications from external people who do not support and/or are not conductive for your performance. This applies to the tennis player in equal parts to individuals as a wider practice to be conscious of and safeguard your own internal compass against this type of noise.

One of the biggest culprits of negative noise with quite alarming trends in each demographic worldwide becomes apparent on social media. Unfortunately, most players/athletes are a part of one, if not multiple social media platforms and their direct inner circle — those inside the triangular relationship: parents and/or guardians and the player’s coach, often are also using these platforms. In other words, no one is void from this type of noise. Each person within any given inner circle has a role to play — a responsibility, to ensure the player/athlete in this context maintains their course along The Pathway and that any potential form of negative noise is minimised. This is more simple than perhaps thought as while each person is susceptible to the influences of social media and their own respective version of negative noice, a greater awareness of this and steps in place can in fact limit this impact with the right inner circle in place.

Keeping the player/athlete at the forefront remains key, especially if this player/athlete remains inside the scope of the developmental spectrum. This age range is not only more susceptible to negative noise but are equally as impressionable to negative influences. Interestingly and often ignored is that poor behaviours that a player/athlete may exhibit have oftentimes been picked up from their inner circle. The more concerning aspect with social media is that this broadens an individual’s inner circle if controls are not enforced (think boundaries) to protect that developing child and their susceptibility to view right and wrong (albeit simplified). An interesting conversation to be had.

Turning to child psychology to human behaviour, it is well known the levels of susceptibility to impressionability in the developing child. Rather, this is the age range where they’re learning ‘good’ and ‘bad’ and they will continue along this learning curve until their later years into adulthood. Of equal importance is that this still rings true for young adults who are continuing to pave their way in the world — sporting or otherwise. This highlights the role of social media at all ages — particularly within these earlier years, whether child to maturing adult, that impressionability is still an active behaviour that most are susceptible towards and that trends on social media to interacting with others should be cautioned if any such ‘right’ and/or ‘wrong’ debate is brought to the surface. By keeping that inner circle tight knit affords a level of guidance to gently nudge players/athletes in the desired direction opposed to deviating and becoming susceptible to a new fad and/or otherwise misstep.

Irrespective of your age, social media does leave you susceptible to impressions and the more frequently these are viewed, your scope of understanding may become fractured in particular if your inner circle leans towards these views.

A players/athletes behaviours and what shapes them should be well accounted for whilst the parent and/or guardian remains mindful of these influences. This includes the varying facets of the Coach-Athlete relationship that have now been discussed and revisited throughout this Chapter, including the coach-parent relationship and the power of establishing the triangular relationship. Keeping in tune with placing the child at the forefront is the choice of hiring and firing your coach — giving the player/athlete a level of responsibility to learn what is helpful for their inner circle and what might not be as effective. By being encouraged to make these decisions early on helps the player/athlete with their decision making processes but also keeps them accountable to their choices in respect to their coach. That is, a player/athlete should be encouraged to decide who fits their game best and who should be included in their inner circle — with the help of their parent and/or guardian, and if their current coach falls into the less than optimal category of no longer being effective and/or helpful at this ‘new’ stage of development as they pursue The Long Game.

Posted on 26 October 20237 August 2024 by Dr B

Revisiting the Coach-Athlete Relationship Part 3: Developing an Elite Tennis Player

Having commenced the review on the initial sections of The Secrets to Optimal Performance Success with the coach-athlete relationship charging the way, the next topics to be dived into are Player Behaviour and Mental Stability. With each respective section of the Book thoroughly shared with new insights, it should be of no surprise how these ‘moving parts’ piece together to develop the whole player/athlete to sharing how they intersect to empower the player/athlete as a whole for The Long Game that is akin to that next peak performance cycle. To harness these peaks and to ensure they’re equally accommodating the needs of the player/athlete becomes key to consider these otherwise indirect components on The Pathway towards the Top 100 and progressively the Top 10.

When it comes to shining the light on Player Behaviour and how it remains the responsibility of the coach it really comes down to boundaries set and specific behaviours that are tolerated although otherwise frowned upon. Keeping in mind the rulers that govern the sport of tennis (i.e. the code of conduct), setting firm principles from the beginning can help prepare your player for future success. In other words, whilst some elite players can get away with poor behaviour due to the status and/or ‘fandom’ that they’re achieved, this isn’t the rule nor does it represent a normalcy to be condoned. By all accounts the rules can be bent, although not encouraged, but the player/athlete needs to be able to progress to these heights to begin with before they can independently decide if certain questionable behaviours resonate with their game.

More often than not the answer will be no due to the confines set by the coach and their parents and/or guardians during the developmental years. However, players do become more impressionable when these heights are later reached i.e. Top 100, Top 50, Top 20 when they’re becoming more widely known and can fall back into poor Player Behaviours and/or develop them if their coach and/or those privy to their inner circle do not continue to uphold these initial boundaries and reaffirm healthy behaviours. In other words, at no ranking and/or age is a player immune but it is the precedent set that allows for these behaviours to either be controlled or to be let loose.

Keeping in mind the ethics that bind our sport and communities as a whole, it is much more simple to align with these ethics opposed to potential fines and/or penalties later on that can tarnish the credibility of the player/athlete and their status in the sport.

You might not agree but there are rules in sport for a reason to ensure equality and respect all round. As a leader in the eye of the public, tennis players need to abide by these for the integrity of their sport. One of the all-time greats of our sport once said something along the lines of ‘no sport is a person, the sport is bigger than one person, the sport will continue on without that person‘. Having amassed 22 Grand Slams to date, this exceptional player — one of two all-time leaders of these core principles continues to champion the code of conduct, ethics to the underlying principles to rulers of our game with the utmost integrity. If you don’t know who I am referring to, this player has never thrown and/or broken a tennis racket let alone put his integrity in question and is highlighted in Episode 47.

Of course, how does this tie into a player’s Mental Stability? This is quite simple and streamlined. If a player/athlete does not have the tools to manage their own mental and emotional health as they do their physical health, cracks will begin to show through their performance. This may have to do with the performance — not being satisfied with their results, and/or completely external away from the tennis courts — poor outcomes and/or scenarios that they’ve been exposed to and they do not know how to behave/cope. In either case, the player/athlete can show signs through their behaviours and their performance on their Mental Stability and a coach is in turn responsible for having the necessary conversations with the player/athlete to firstly ensure they’re doing alright, and secondly to be that trustworthy person the player/athlete can confide in. This is where the triangular relationship is even more powerful as it keeps the player/athlete front and centre and it allows the coach to keep an open line of communication with the parent/s and/or guardian/s to share any concerning Player Behaviours to get on top of as well as discussing the need to focus on Mental Stability in different forms — external conditioning that serves the players/athletes overall wellbeing.

The key reminder here is that signs will appear and will become apparent if you’ve built a solid coach-athlete relationship with the player/athlete. The same applies to the parent and/or guardian. Placing the player/athlete to child at the forefront and keeping tabs on Player Behaviour to their Mental Stability not only helps them reach their optimal state of play — progressively and continuously, but it allows for those peak performance cycles to be worked towards collectively and consistently. The same applies when something doesn’t go as anticipated for the player/athlete and for them to have the tools to cope and control their behaviour to avoid passing on less than ethical behaviours and/or those against the rules that govern the sport of tennis. By having access to these tools ensures players/athletes are better equipped to stay the pace of The Long Game opposed to being derailed as a consequence of less than conducive behaviours.

Tag: relationship